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Ten characters meme

Ten fictional characters who I would shag:

Actually, I found this very difficult after the first three. If the story-line is one of a romance with a happy ending, then I feel I don't want to interfere in someone else's relationship (even a fictional character's). And even if it's not that kind of story, just because I find them interesting doesn't mean I'm desperately keen to shag them. So, the top four I'm totally sure of, largely because their role in the story includes a certain element of shagging everything that looks sufficiently interesting, and I think I would be sufficiently interested for a fling; the next two are fascinating characters who don't exactly radiate availability but I wouldn't mind a go with, as long as I knew I'd survive the experience; and the bottom four are a grab-bag from my shelves and memory of TV programmes. So, in reverse order, the ten fictional characters I'd shag are:

10. Stephanie Plum
She's been good company for me on many a plane flight, particularly going through Vienna airport where she always seems to be waiting for me. Stephanie hunts down bad guys (though not usually very bad guys) in New Jersey, and we hear of her life via Janet Evanovich. Her love life is complex, and I would figure in it only briefly.

9. Helena Justina
Like Stephanie, Helena Justina solves mysteries and fights crime, but this time in first-century Rome. This picture (if indeed it is her) doesn't show her at her best; she is aristocratic, sarcastic, and very intelligent. She would also break my rule of not interfering in a steady relationship, since she lives in nearly wedded bliss with Marcus Didius Falco, at least according to author Lindsey Davies. However, I don't think it counts, because he has been dead for about 1900 years.

(Of course, so has she...)

8. Caitlín Mulryan
This is rather a desperate and random grab off the bookshelf. Caitlín turns up in Poul Anderson's The Avatar as the hero's lover, but turns out to be a more complex character than just the love interest, and apparently show up in some of Anderson's later books too. It was a close call between her and the time-travelling girlfriend from Anderson's There Will Be Time. Caitlín wins on the grounds that a) I can remember her name and b) she is Irish.

(I'm a bit sad that I can't really think of another bonkable character from the works of any of the other great classic sf writers.)

7. Susan Ivanova
Funny how despite the fact that I'm a Doctor Who fan, and have more than a passing acquaintance with Star Trek, there's none of the characters that really leap into the bonkable category for me. On the other hand, I only watched Babylon 5 a few times, yet I'd really like to take Commander Ivanova aside and help her unwind. And see below for two more classic media sf characters.

6. Death
Definitely in the category of dangerous but attractive. Very dangerous.

5. Scully
This feels like a bit of a cop-out, since I found the X-Files increasingly silly as the years went on; but if we're talking early series Scully, still trying to make sense of the confusing world around her, then I think it's possible.

4. Dr Frank 'N' Furter
Don't get strung out
By the way I look
Don't judge a book by its cover
I'm not much of a man
By the light of day
But by night I'm one hell of a lover!

How could anyone resist?

3. Eleanor of Aquitaine
Now, this really is cheating in that Eleanor of Aquitaine was a genuine historical personality. My excuse is that so many myths and legends have been woven around her that she has featured as a fictional character in numerous novels, plays and films. The picture here is the only one known to be really her, from her tombstone, and probably doesn't represent her at her most glamorous (she was around 80 when she died in 1204). If she could fit me into her busy schedule in the spring of 1152, between her divorcing the king of France (to whom she had been married for fifteen years) and marrying the future king of England, I wouldn't complain. She'd have been in her late 20s at the time.

2. Phedre no Delaunay
Scholar, spy and courtesan, world traveller and political activist, in the universe that is described by author Jacqueline Carey, I think I could find enough in common with Phedre to make it work for at least one hot date, since that is her specialty.

1. Faith

What more need be said? (Though oddly enough I can't manage the same level of enthusiasm for Tru in Tru Calling. I guess it's the superior production values of Buffy.)

[Edited to add:] I was inspired to do this by pickwick's list, though I think I may have seen it from someone else first. Since then I note another list of boys from annafdd, and lists of girls from mylescorcoran here and kradical here.

Thanks to comments below from djm4, I realise that I unjustly neglected both Bernice Summersfield from the New Adventures of Doctor Who series, and Ashley Watt from Iain Banks' novel The Crow Road. I would also like to add Angelina DiGriz of the Stainless Steel Rat books from mylescorcoran's list, and Officer Tina Russo from Hill Street Blues from kradical's list. So, sorry to Stephanie Plum, Helena Justina, Caitlín Mulryan, and Scully, you're off the list. (But Susan Ivanova can stay on it.)


( 24 comments — Leave a comment )
Jul. 20th, 2005 10:29 pm (UTC)
Quite a list... ;-)
Jul. 20th, 2005 11:04 pm (UTC)
Faith, Ivanova and Death - hell yes! There are quite a few Dr Who characters I'd consider: anyone played by Pamela Salem, either Romana, Jabe and Bernice Summerfield.

Adora Belle Dearheart from Terry Pratchett's Going Postal is about the only character of his I fancied from the moment she appeared on the page; she is so my type, but probably falls into the 'happily relationshipped by the end of the story' category. See also Ashley Watt from Iain Banks's The Crow Road in this respect.
Jul. 21st, 2005 06:53 am (UTC)
You're dead right about both Ashley Watt and Bernice Summerfield. Since our tastes are obviously so closely aligned, I'd better go and familiarise myself with the others you mention!
Jul. 20th, 2005 11:50 pm (UTC)
Vaguely surprised there were no Doctor Who companions there, to be honest. Leela of the Sevateem? Phwoar. Mind you, seeing Louise Jameston in whatever soap opera she was in recently would kinda put me off her.

Also, Death deserves to be in the top three, at least.

(as a side-note, it is quite bizarre to reconcile my mental image of nhw, European beaurocrat extraordinaire, and this new nhw who is talking about bonking / shagging fictional characters...)
Jul. 21st, 2005 07:03 am (UTC)
Hey, I may be old enough to be your father, but that doesn't mean I have no interest in these matters!


Leela - not really my type physically, and I don't think we'd have an awful lot in common.

Death - would be in the top three apart from the rather large risk factor involved. Even with the risk factor, she still makes it to #5. (I've never found Desire to be very interesting, and I think Delirium is the kind of girl you walk home from the party and put safely in her own bed before going home yourself to yours.)
Jul. 21st, 2005 10:45 pm (UTC)
Aren't you married?
Jul. 22nd, 2005 06:49 am (UTC)
Silly boy. Of course I am.
Jul. 22nd, 2005 04:07 pm (UTC)
Then shouldn't it be "Ten fictional characters who I would shag if they existed and I wasn't married:"? :p.
Jul. 22nd, 2005 04:15 pm (UTC)
I think "fictional" contains most of that!
Jul. 21st, 2005 12:01 am (UTC)
Ten fictional characters who I would shag:

Oh, you are lowering the tone of LiveJournal.

My delicate sensibilities have been rather shaken by this.I must go outside for some air as I am feeling rather faint.
Jul. 21st, 2005 05:23 am (UTC)
Jul. 21st, 2005 07:10 am (UTC)
Eleanor of Aquitaine
If she couldn't squeeze you in before she married Henry II, I'd gladly distract him for a while after their marriage to give you two some privacy.
Jul. 21st, 2005 09:14 am (UTC)
Re: Eleanor of Aquitaine
Yeah, and he seems to have fairly distractable too!

Jul. 21st, 2005 08:52 am (UTC)
Eleanor huh? As played by Katie Hepburn or Glen Close?
Jul. 21st, 2005 09:19 am (UTC)
Hmm, hadn't seen the Glenn Close version, thanks for flagging it up to me!

No, preferably the Eleanor of about 25 years earlier, who remains fictional.
Jul. 21st, 2005 10:25 am (UTC)
I am pretty sure it was Glenn Close, though my attention was more solidly fixed on Patrick Stewart playing Henry. Pretty good but only within faint shouting distance of the original. My impressions of poor Eleanor are forever scarred though by exposure to the Jean Plaidy, historical romance version of her life at a tender age. Brrrrr! Even in that version though I felt she was well shot of St Louis. Nitwit! Nice Chapelle though.
Jul. 21st, 2005 09:28 am (UTC)
I did think of Faith, but I'm slightly scared because of what happened when she shagged Xander (in The Zeppo)...but she is VERY sexy.
Jul. 22nd, 2005 11:47 am (UTC)
Hey, she didn't actually kill him!
Jul. 21st, 2005 04:31 pm (UTC)
You say of faith: "What more need be said? (Though oddly enough I can't manage the same level of enthusiasm for Tru in Tru Calling. I guess it's the superior production values of Buffy.)"

It's not because Tru is a completely different character to Faith? If it's the actor playing the role you're interested in, it's hardly a fictional character, is it?

I'll doubtless succumb to similar problems when I do this one myself. I'm still sifting my memories for possibles.
Jul. 22nd, 2005 11:48 am (UTC)
You're right, of course.
Jul. 21st, 2005 07:14 pm (UTC)
Have you laminated your list?
Only skim read your entry but it reminded me of an episode of friends... don't suppose you've seen it? ;)
Jul. 22nd, 2005 11:49 am (UTC)
Re: Have you laminated your list?
That would be this episode - a long time ago, I think!
Jul. 22nd, 2005 11:14 am (UTC)
Missing option
Come on, Nicholas. Given that you were a teenage boy the same time as me, and an SF fan to boot, how could you possibly have left out this lady?

Anyway, as long as you don't get your list laminated, you can still change it...
Jul. 22nd, 2005 11:52 am (UTC)
Re: Missing option
I was never overwhelmed by her at the time, but then I happened to catch that episode where she spends much of the time tied up in the basement, and I must admit it gave me what the nuns at school used to refer to as "impure thoughts".
( 24 comments — Leave a comment )

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